Today.....

Today was.....well just another day of dieing inside. I've been listening to this song over and over for hours and crying on and off. Jason keeps telling me it'll get better but I just cant see through this fog right now. I cry then I get pissed off at myself for crying over him. I question whether or not he's worth the tears. There are so many unanswered questions. Today I called his phone just to hear his voice for one last time. I can't keep going on like this. I ask Jason everyday if he's heard from kirnan and of course he does nearly everyday and all he seems to be doing is trying to justify his actions. It's becoming more and more obvious to me that there's nothing left of the man I fell in love with a year ago. He's been dead since I came home from England for him. I'm just so sad. so many unanswered questions. so much resentment on both parts.